Every BFN is hard. Every CD1 is a letdown. This mornings stark white BFN was just a slap in the face. I let my phantom symptoms get the best of me once again. I let myself start saying "if", and I let myself start to think about how wonderful it could be to tell our parents over Christmas.
I know not all hope is lost, it is only 12DPO and my temp is still high; but I was nearly certain yesterday. This morning I let go of all certainty and most of the hope I have been desperately clinging to. I am still experiencing all my same symptoms, but I am trying not to attribute them to being KU. My heartburn is back with a vengeance; seriously, how can fruity pebbles cereal give me heartburn??? And I was up most of last night, partly because I was so excited for what the morning could bring, and partly from the heartburn. Now, if only my body could either get better or be positively pregnant. KTHNXBY.
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